Last Days in Belarus...

January 8, 2009

We woke up late that morning, and the kids missed their first day of school after Christmas vacation! (Apparently, that's not too uncommon). Instead, they stayed home and cleaned up the house!

Andrei also missed his first two lessons (he was due back at the orphanage that morning), but again that was no big deal. We headed back to Ryasno with him around 10:00 and got there at 11:00. We stopped by the village store to buy some bananas and cheese so that the children could have one last treat for lunch. Andrei was, of course, in a somber mood as he was coming to terms with the fact that he wouldn't see me in the summer (his last three summers were spent with me here in America). While Misha and I were inside the store, Inna said that he spoke with her like an adult for the first time ever. He's usually very immature, but he simply said in a very insightful way, "The time sure passed by quickly, didn't it?"

When I got back in the car, I gave him some Belarussian money so that he can buy some food from the store every now and then (they are NOT eating very well at the orphanage these days--plus, he's a growing, 14-year-old adolescent). We dropped him off, chatted with Victor, the new orphanage director, and then retrieved Andrei's old suitcases from storage (because he didn't need them anymore). Misha had asked if he could have the suitcases for his upcoming mission trip to Siberia.

We said our goodbyes to Andrei, and I cried some more. Not as much because I know that this family will bring him home from the orphanage when they can. However, it was still a sad moment because I knew that it would be a while until they can pick him up again (since Misha is headed to Siberia in February).

When we got back to Mogilev, we did a little shopping for candy and also for a few more groceries at the Hippo store (we were going to make dranikis that night). After that, they took me to the ARK House for our farewell pizza party with the group. It was fun to socialize with everyone and reflect on our experiences in Belarus. I tried some salted fatback (not cooked) just to say that I had. I'd have to say that the pizza from Parmesan Restaurant was MUCH better!

After the party, we got home, rested, packed my suitcase, and had dinner. I also called Iryna and talked to her a while so that we could say our goodbyes. After that, we tried to call Denis and Vova, but no one picked up the phone. Then I went to bed and slept the sleep of the dead.

Friday, January 9, 2009

I got up, ate breakfast, fixed some food for the road (salami & cheese sandwich plus fruit, candy, and bottled water), said goodbye to the kids (who were off to school), and then left to meet the bus. Again, it was good to catch up with everyone and begin to process all that had happened to me, through me, and around me this year in Belarus.

The trip to Minsk was slow (because it was snowing), but we made it in plenty of time. It was sad saying goodbye to Yura and Lena, but by that time, now that I'd already left my boys behind, I was ready to be beamed straight back to America--to my bed. Both plane rides were uneventful, and I made it back into the U.S.A. without incident.

I praise God for all that He did on this trip. He opened up the boys' hearts to His love and to His Word. I am so thankful that now the door has been opened for me to really minister to these children now--through my ever-increasing knowledge of Russian and through the ever-strengthening bond that my boys and I share. My Vova seems to be particularly open to the Lord, and it's for him that I have been most fervently praying. In fact, once I returned home, I wrote out a prayer for him (which my friend Gennady translated), practiced it, and prayed it with him over the phone this past weekend. I plan to do this with Vova each week so that he might become ever more aware of how deep our Father's love is for us. Here is the prayer (in English and in Russian):

Dear God,

Thank you so much for my precious Vova. I thank you that he is such a good boy and that he is always such a good helper. I pray that you would keep him safe each day and that you would help him to do his best in school. Lord, please help him to love You, pray to You each day, and live his life in a way that pleases You.

Jesus, I pray that You would protect Vova as he sleeps tonight, and I pray that you would give him good dreams. I ask You, Lord, to please bring him and Denis back safely to me this summer. Thank you, God, for loving us so much, and thank you for giving me such a wonderful Belarussian son.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen



Дорогой Бог, наш Отец Небесный,

Огромное Тебе спасибо за моего славного Вову. Спасибо Тебе за то, что он такой отличный парень, который всегда готов прийти на помощь другим. Я молюсь и прошу Тебя охранять его каждый день. Помоги ему в его стараниях успевать в школе. Господь, пожалуйста, помоги ему любить Тебя и обращаться к Тебе с молитвами каждый день. Помоги ему жить так чтобы Ты, Господь, был им доволен.

Иисус, я молюсь за то, чтобы Ты охранял его во сне эту ночь. Я молю Тебя дать ему хорошие сны. Я прошу тебя, Господь, устрой так, чтобы Вова и Денис снова приехали ко мне этим летом и сохрани их в пути. Бог, спасибо Тебе за Твою безграничную любовь к нам и спасибо, что Ты нашел мне такого прекрасного беларуского сына.

Молюсь именем Иисуса,

Аминь





Thanks so much for reading.

The First Round of Goodbyes...

January 7, 2009--Eastern Orthodox Christmas Day

When we woke up that morning, it was FREEZING in the orphanage. I delayed getting out of bed for two reasons--one, I was cold, and two, I knew I would be saying goodbye to Vova and Denis that day. We had blinis with sour cream for breakfast, and we just hung out with the kids for a while until the two Svetlanas arrived to work (they didn't really have to work on Christmas Day, but they wanted to spend time with me). Larissa and Sasha also came to the orphanage so that we could all be together for my last few hours in Belarus. We had coffee together with some of the other caretakers at the orphanage, and the children drew pictures and wrote notes to my students back in America.

I also got Vova and Denis' belongings organized to go home with them. I gave Vova a new wallet I'd been saving for him (earlier in the trip he'd asked me if I would buy him one). And of course I put some Belarussian money in it--as payment for all the massages and back scratching! :-)

The children hard at work on their drawings...

Vova wanted to trace his picture!

After the children finished their pictures, we just hung out and played some games. I played a German card game with both Svetlanas, and I played Dominoes with Sasha. While we played, I asked him again if he wanted to stay with me in America this summer. (Earlier, he had said that his favorite things are the pool and the bathtub. I assured him that we go to the pool quite often in the summer, and that I also have a bathtub at home!) Sasha asked why the trip had to be for so long (six weeks), but I think that, little by little, as he grew more and more attached to me, he was becoming more comfortable with the thought of spending the summer in America.

Around 3:00, Lena from ABRO called and said that the bus would be picking me up in about an hour (the group was on their way back from Christmas Day services at Kostyukovichi). When we received this phone call, I had to go be by myself for a few minutes and cry my eyes out. After I got composed, I went back into the TV room where Vova was sitting, and he saw that I'd been crying (and of course I started to cry again as I sat there watching him). Apparently, he was filled with compassion because he came and sat down beside me so that I could lay my head in his lap--he gently rubbed my head for a few minutes to try to comfort me.

When their brother Pavel arrived, I grabbed some more tissues from Svetlana because I knew the worst was yet to come. He took me and the boys to the bus station (where the ABRO group would pick Andrei and me up) and then went back to the Shelter to pick up both Svetlanas so that they could wait with us. It was so cold, and my tears were freezing to my face and my beard! When I gave Vova and Denis their last hugs, it was impossible for me to even talk. All I could do was cry and hold on to them. They stayed fairly well composed, but I am sure that their tears came later on. I was finally able to croak out the words, "I love you so much" and then they turned toward the car to go home with Pavel.

Because it was so cold, Andrei, the two Svetlanas, and I went inside the bus station to wait. And that's where I completely lost it and cried 'til it hurt. I literally gave myself a splitting headache with all the sinus pressure I built up. All the while, I prayed for Denis and Vova, begging God to protect them, clinging to the belief that they are better of in His hands than in mine.

We waited a few more minutes, I got calmed down a bit, and then our bus arrived. When I had to say goodbye to Svetlana Vladimirovna and Svetlana Ivanovna, the waterworks started all over again. They assured me that they will help the children and asked that I call them when I got home to America. Leaving the boys was the hardest (because of the uncertainty of their home situation), but leaving these dear, sweet friends was almost as difficult.

Andrei and I climbed onto the bus, and I just sat down, put my head down, and kept on crying. When we arrived to Mogilev, Inna met us and took us to church (I really did not feel like going to church, but I did). I cried sitting there during the service and then started to fall asleep in my chair. Inna came and told me that I could go sit on the couch in the cloak room (I gladly accepted the offer because it was dark and quiet in there). And of course I just kept on crying--my head was killing me! I tried to take a nap during the two-hour service, but I couldn't fall asleep.

After the service, we went home, ate some dinner (I wasn't hungry at all), and then went to bed. Andrei's stomach was upset, so he and I lay beside each other a while, and I rubbed his belly before he got in his bed. I prayed hard for Denis and Vova and finally drifted off to sleep.

Christmas Eve #2--Last full day in Cherikov...

Tuesday, January 6, 2009



Breakfast at the Shelter--Nikita (3) and Kristina (5)

The boys in the bunk room and I got up around 10 and had breakfast--these little fried cheese curd patties--not too bad, but not great either. Denis (hates cheese) certainly wasn't excited to see them! :-) We hung out a bit at the Shelter with the kids--Andrei, Vadim, Tanya, and Denis and then went shopping to buy fruit, sodas, and candy for Sasha and Kostya (the two boys who really captured my heart). We delivered Sasha's and then went grocery shopping for the Sofins--we were headed over there to visit and have lunch. We bought them kielbasa, cheese, fish, bread, butter, ice cream, pasta, juice...

When we got to the Sofins' home, Natasha had fixed quite a meal. They killed and roasted a duck, made blinis, cutlets, other cold cuts, cheese, etc. Natasha even made and decorated the cake herself. Svetlana and I were encouraged to see that things seemed to be okay. Misha also tried to get me and Svetlana to taste some of his homemade moonshine. It smelled like tequila, and I tasted just a tiny bit and said I couldn't drink anymore because it was STRONG! He seemed shocked that I don't drink hard liquor or smoke!




Natasha--Vova & Denis' mom




Misha--Vova & Denis' dad




Vova LOVES fish.


However, all this was nothing more than a facade. I later came to find out that Natasha left home that night to do what she so often does--socialize, drink, etc. She was probably frustrated that I didn't leave a bunch of money directly with her (very dangerous). I had prayed a lot about this and decided that it would be best to leave the money with Svetlana in the Shelter. That morning, we locked up $500 in the safe and only told Vova about it (he is SO trustworthy). We told him that, if they needed something (shoes, groceries, anything), he should call Svetlana and that they would meet in town, exchange some of the money, and buy whatever they need. The money will go much further this way.


After we finished eating, Svetlana decided to buy a few ducks and a bag of feed from the Sofins. She was SO excited. The fun part was catching the ducks. Vova's sister Lena caught three of them for Svetlana and shoved them into burlap sacks! After we rounded up the ducks, I told Svetlana that I was NOT going to wring their necks! (She just wanted them for the eggs). :-)



When we got back to the Shelter, we hung out for a while and visited briefly with Dima's (17-year-old special needs boy) parents who wanted to buy me a gift. I gave them $100 more so that they can buy him more diapers when they run out. After that, we walked to Kostya's house to deliver his fruit, candy, and sodas. When we went inside, he got up from the floor (he was watching TV) to greet us. I also saw his two precious Matchbox cars, which he'd been playing with there on the floor. He wasn't going to let them out of his sight! He was excited to receive more gifts, and then unfortunately we had to leave.

It was SO cold outside, and we walked to Svetlana's house for a huge Christmas Eve dinner/gathering. Lena and Artyom came, plus Sasha, Larissa, and Marina, and Svetlana and her family, plus my boys and me! It was AWESOME!

When we got home, the ladies were cooking, and the boys and I rested a while and watched a movie. At first, they started watching a movie that I was uncomfortable with them watching (it was some Russian mafia film they said was really cool). However, I told them that, I can't always know what they watch when they're not with me but that I wouldn't allow them to watch inappropriate movies when I'm around. They understood, and we then found a Disney movie that was much more suitable.

After the movie, it was time for my first Russian Banya (a.k.a. sauna/steam bath). Thankfully, Svetlana has her own private Banya at her house and I didn't have to bathe in public! She sent the three boys and me in together and explained to Vova what to do. We all stripped down, went inside, and the heat and steam about took my breath away. I had to crouch close to the floor so that I could breathe! We each had a bucket into which we ladled scalding-hot water and then added some cool water to make warm water. The boys were used to this because they do it all the time, but I wasn't! We had to keep going out into the undressing area and getting sips of water and soda. Remember that it's about -5 degrees outside, and in the undressing area it wasn't much warmer! (But it was NICE and warm inside the Banya). I'm glad I had the boys there to pour water over my head because I was completely inept at this. I'm used to standing under the shower head to get all the soap off my back and shampoo out of my hair! It was also great to have them to scrub my back with this awesome scrub brush!

Denis was so funny...and needs supervision when he bathes so that he actually gets clean! I told him to wash his hair, and he told me he already had (but I hadn't seen him doing so). I asked him if he used shampoo, and he said, "No." So we scrubbed his head thoroughly.

Then I said, "What about the rest of you? Did you use soap?"

And he said, "No, I forgot!" I asked him how in the world he could forget the soap?! So then we got him scrubbed from head to toe!

After our Banya, we quickly got dressed and headed back inside. Larissa and Sasha had arrived in the meantime. Then we sat down and all had dinner together.



Sasha and me


Christmas Eve Dinner



"Show me some teeth when you smile, Sasha!"




Lena--wearing the antlers I sent Svetlana as a gag gift!

After dinner, tea, and dessert, Vova asked me about another movie (which I was unsure about), and I whispered into his ear that I thought it might be scary--and I didn't want him having more bad dreams. He complied without protest because he understood what I was implying. This gave us the opportunity for a great discussion later that night...about watching inappropriate movies.

While we were hanging out, I also discreetly talked to Sasha about possibly coming to America. (I had to do this discreetly because Andrei was there, and Sasha, if he comes, will be taking his spot...SAD!) I asked Sasha if he knew how long the trip is to America--six weeks. He said, "Six weeks? How many days is that?" I told him 42, and he said he thought it might be better if he stayed for around 30 days! To which I responded that he wasn't allowed to go back to Belarus without the rest of the group! Larissa later told me that he makes month-long trips to the sanitorium in Babrousk all the time, so she thought he would be just fine--particularly if he were with me the whole time.

Around 10:00, we headed back to the Shelter, stayed up a while longer, and went to bed. Larissa, Sasha, and Marina had to walk all the way home in the COLD (-20 degrees F). I felt so bad for them! We contemplated calling a taxi for them, but Larissa said that in such a small town, all the taxis were finished running for the evening.

Because it was SO cold, we and all the kids went to bed fully dressed (it was important to me that I experience the same living conditions as the kids while in the Shelter). Vova scratched my back again (he told me that I owed him lots of rubles by then!!), and then we chatted about watching bad movies. I told him that I know they have plenty of them at his house but that I don't think it makes God very happy when we watch these kinds of things. I told him that I'm an adult and I don't even watch these kinds of movies. We both agreed that he probably couldn't just turn off the movie if an older brother was watching a bad one. However, we talked about ways he can avoid watching them. He said that he could go to bed, go outside, or just go play somewhere else. I was so proud of him.

After I said good night to Vova, I got Denis to lie down with me for a few minutes so that I could reassure him that he would get to see Inna and Misha again soon. I told him that Svetlana has their phone number and can put them in touch anytime. I also told him that they would come pick them up sometime on a school holiday.


He also asked me about leaving money for his mama, and I told him that everything was taken care of. I told him that I didn't want Mama buying alcohol with it. He understands this (at the ripe old age of 9), but he also begged--"But Papa, she's not drinking anymore." (Little did he know that his mom had left home that very evening). I explained to him that we didn't know what tomorrow might bring, and I think he understood. I assured him that, if they needed something, Vova would tell Svetlana, and they would take care of it.


All this ripped my heart out...again. And of course I cried that night...a lot.

Christmas Party at the Cherikov Social Shelter "Proleska"

Monday, January 5th, 2009

It was a hectic morning looking for things at the last minute (namely Vova's new gloves). I sort of scolded him for not putting them back in his jacket pocket. Well, he REALLY took this scolding to heart and was frantically searching for them. We were all eating breakfast, and bless his heart, he was desperately looking for the gloves I'd bought him. Someone asked, "Where's Vova?" and I went and found him and told him to come eat breakfast. He immediately started crying and yelled, "I don't want to eat!" I just hugged him and told him that they were only gloves, that we would eventually find them, and that of course he is much more important to me than a silly pair of gloves! He instantly recovered and came to the table. (I later found the gloves in my suitcase in Cherikov.)

We left for Cherikov around 10:30. As we sat in the car waiting for the bus to pick us up, Misha and Inna said their goodbyes to Denis and Vova, and we all sang Silent Night one more time and again talked about the meaning of the song--why the night was holy and about how Jesus is the best gift we've ever been given.

Again, the boys made it through the bus ride without getting sick! Yay for Bonine! When we got upstairs at the Shelter, carrying all the gifts, I immediately saw Sasha's and Kostya's smiling faces. It was so cool--their faces lit up when I walked into the room. They both exclaimed, "There's Uncle!" (In Russian they usually call new people "Uncle" and "Aunt" rather than "that guy" or "that lady"). As quickly as I could, I sat down my belongings and went to greet the boys. I also was excited to see Dima from the Raleigh-Grace group.

I gave Kostya a hug and a kiss and then sat down with Sasha. Then, they asked the kids to move to another area of the room (for the festivities), and I went with them. When we sat down, I had Kostya on one knee and Sasha on the other. It was so great! They just soaked up all this love and attention. Sasha eventually asked me, "Am I coming to America?" [He knew that his mom had been inquiring with Svetlana about finding him placement in a summer program. Of course, I was immediately wanting to say "Yes," but I told him that I hope so.]

15-year-old Tanya and I eventually sang "How Great Is Our God" in Russian for the whole group. We sang other Russian Christmas songs, played games, danced, and gave out gifts. Vova and Denis were finally able to get their candy boxes (we told them at Ryasno that their turn for candy boxes would come on the 5th), and I also managed to get one for Sasha and for Kostya (THANKS, Yura!). I also got little gift bags (with toys, toothbrush/paste, etc.) for each of the boys.

When I handed all this to little Kostya, I honestly have never seen a child's eyes light up so brightly. I know this is what Samaritan's Purse volunteers see when they pass out Operation Christmas Child boxes each year. Kostya is not an orphan, so to my knowledge he hasn't been a part of ABRO parties before. His dad takes okay care of him and his sister, but I visited their home, and this little child has NOTHING. No toys, not much love, no joy. Well, joy came to him this day--through the simple gifts we gave him. When he saw the two Matchbox cars in his bag, he smiled a smile that I will never forget. There was also a warm scarf, some gloves (which were too big for his tiny hands--we decided that he'd give them to his papa), etc. I honestly have never seen a child smile like Kostya did that day.

After the festivities were over, we went downstairs and had lunch. Then it was time for the group to head back to Mogilev. (The boys and I were staying in Cherikov until the 7th when the group would pick Andrei and me up on the way back from their trip to Kostyukovichi). We hung around the Shelter with the children for a while, and then we went to Lena's house (Svetlana's best friend) for dinner. (Svetlana was celebrating a friend's retirement that night, so she had to miss spending time with us). On the way over to Lena's house, Larissa and I chatted, and she said that it was evident that the kids love me very much. Her son Sasha chimed in and said, "And I love him, too...completely." It was so sweet. :-) We both chuckled, surprised that he warmed up to me so quickly. Later, Larissa also shared with me that Sasha had said that I'm much better than his dad. She asked him why, and he said that when he visits his dad on weekends and holidays, all he does is watch TV. So, I'm very glad that I'm able to show this precious boy some love.

The kids watched cartoons while the ladies prepared dinner. We had a delicious dinner of meat-filled "dranikis" (potato pancakes) with sour cream on the side. Larissa also baked another cake for us--I made sure to save room for it this time. I also discreetly told the boys that she had gone to the trouble to bake it for us, so they should be polite and have a piece. They all dad, and I know they enjoyed it! We went back to the Shelter around 9:30 and headed to bed (with the boys in their bunkroom) around 10. Vova offered to scratch my back again before we went to sleep (in an effort to delay bedtime per se), and we also heard Denis sniffling a bit--I think he was crying because he was already beginning to miss Inna and Misha. He started asking me for their phone number because he wanted to talk to Inna. :-)

And when Vova lay down to sleep, he also started snorting (and making other hocking noises!!), which indicated to me that he was also crying. The next day (when I started crying in Svetlana's office), in an effort to console me, he did say that the night before he'd cried, too, because he didn't want me to leave. It's true--the hardest part of the trip was the last few days--as it began to hit me that it would be five more months until the boys and I saw each other again. I slept okay, but my throat did bother me (because I didn't bring any Claritin with me to Belarus!)



Miscellaneous pictures from our Christmas party...






Svetlana (Cherikov Director) and Lena (ABRO)





Kostya and girls reciting poems and receiving gifts from Father Frost





8-year-old Andrei at Proleska Shelter







Precious Valera and Nikita

Vova's & Denis' last day in Mogilev...

Sunday, January 4th, 2009

The boys were excited to finally get to wear their new clothes to church today! It was Communion Sunday, so it was very worshipful to take part in this service with my Belarussian brothers and sisters in Christ. The Solonikovs have had many doubts about whether or not there are "real" Christians in America. They have said before that, now that they know me, they know that these do exist in the West! Their church is an extremely fundamentalist congregation that is quite suspicious of outside influences. Most families don't watch any TV, women aren't allowed to wear pants, absolutely no alcohol in the home, etc. From what I can tell, there are many legalistic aspects to their faith. I certainly understand this--particularly the shield of sorts that they have against alcohol (because drinking is a huge part of Belarussian culture). They aren't judgmental at all; they simply seek to set themselves apart from the world. I surely want to be apart from the world in the way I live my life, but at the same time, I tried to help them see that sometimes we have to go where the world is in order to reach them for Christ. They talked to me a little about "gothic" looking people...with long hair, playing bad music. They said that even some "believers" in Belarus play this sort of music (with Christian lyrics) and that these people can hardly be considered Christians--"You know, they have long hair and play that awful music..." (That's what they said!)

However, I think of the band Flyleaf who fits this description and uses this as a platform for ministry, saying "We go into hell, and we bring people out."

This family was even uncomfortable with my singing Chris Tomlin's "How Great Is Our God" in their church...because it was "too syncopated!" Only hymns in their church (which is pretty comparable to a Church of the Brethren, I guess)! I'm praying that, in the same way that I've learned from them, they might also learn from me. I mean, if my heart is worshiping when I sing a Christ Tomlin tune (or Flyleaf, for that matter), then who's to say that God isn't pleased?

OK, but I digress! :-)

After church, Philip (from our Charlottesville group) and his dad came to pick up me and the boys to take us to their flat for lunch. Iryna was also with them so she could translate for us! It was great to see her again! Stepping into Philip's apartment was like stepping into America--this family is well off by Belarussian standards. Their place is so modern and lavishly furnished. My boys enjoyed playing video games and watching cable TV with Philip. We had a wonderful meal and some great conversation together. We looked at pictures of the birth of their daughter last January and also of Philip's second summer in Charlottesville.

I did, however, feel sorry for Vova, Denis, and Andrei when we were there. I mean, it was good for them to have a nice meal and enjoy some good company for a while, but it must be hard for them to see these folks' house in Mogilev and question their own home environments--for Denis and Vova, they live in a chaotic, alcoholic family in basically a broken-down shack. For Andrei, it's a state-run orphanage. These kids barely have enough food to eat, and they were shown so much excess material wealth (it's not like they aren't exposed to excesses while in America in the summer, but this is right in their own country). I have to say, however, that this family is 100% delightful--so very grateful for the gift that's been given to their son, and they were so kind to Iryna, my boys, and me while we were there. I truly adore them, but at the same time I was sad for Vova, Denis, and Andrei.

After our visit with Philip and his family, we went to evening church for another LONG service. Unlike the morning service, I understood almost nothing (because I was tired). When we got back home after church, we sorted through Vova & Denis' belongings and packed for the next day's trip to Cherikov (where they live). Then, we had dinner. And we just HAD to get a picture of the kids eating dessert afterward. Denis reminded us that the ice cream had been sitting in the freezer "for like two weeks!" So, we broke that open along with fruit, cake that our Russian friends bought from the Hippo store, and of course, to complement everything else, my boys' favorite...PICKLES! If you know them well, you know that they devour pickles. I'm serious. They ate them right along with apples and ice cream!

After dessert, we took pictures of our family, our missionary guests, and then headed off to bed.

Day trip to Ryasno

January 3, 2009


In the early hours of the morning, I awoke to Vova turning on the light. He had wet the bed (top bunk) and was coming down the ladder to put on new clothes. He used the bathroom, and we got him wiped off (thanks to my unlimited supply of Wet Ones!!) and got him some clean clothes. He was ready to lie back down in the bed, but I told him to lie down with me where it was dry! He was so pitiful. He was afraid that Inna would spank him the next day. He said, "It was an accident, Papa. I had a really scary dream." I told him that of course I knew it was an accident. So he lay down with me, and I rubbed his back until he calmed down and went back to sleep. His body seemed so tense, and every now and then he would flinch and fidget from what seemed like anxious tension. This comes as no surprise to me--his life is pretty chaotic, so it's no wonder that he can't relax when he sleeps.

The next morning, I discreetly related to Inna and Misha what had happened, and they said they'd clean up while we were at Ryasno. They completely understand because they have that problem with their kids from time to time!


As soon as we got up, I was sure to give Denis and Vova their 12-hour motion sickness pills because the trip to Ryasno was on a charter bus (Denis threw up twice last year!). Unfortunately, we couldn't find my camera**, so I had to go without it. On the way to the orphanage (a little over an hour), it was nice to actually socialize with our American group.

**hopefully I'll get some pictures from other folks later


When we arrived, I told Denis and Vova that they were not allowed to roam without me. We then carried all the gifts into the gymnasium, and the orphanage children immediately saw me. They yelled to me from across the courtyard! They had missed me so much (and I'd missed them, too). It was a shame I didn't get to spend a few days with them this year, but I think my decision not to (for the Sofin boys' sake, as well as Andrei's) was the right one.

It was a great reunion for the kids and me. My favorite kid--Vova Mikheyev (who goes to Hickory, NC each summer) was a little standoffish at first. He was, I'm sure, disappointed that I didn't spend lots of time there this year and also that I didn't make it down to Hickory last summer to see him (I felt really bad about that). However, later on, he warmed up to me and let me love up on him a bit! He has gotten so tall since last winter! Here is one of my favorite pictures of him and me from last year.

We played lots of little relay games, and of course we had Father Frost and lots of presents. During the auction, I walked to the store and bought ice cream for the kids to have after lunch. This year, we raised around $1,200 through this fundraiser. All the funds go toward improving the orphanage. I also gave Ira her gift from her host family and got to speak to her precious teacher. We locked it up in her classroom, and they also showed me their puppet theater. She asked if we could send them some new hand puppets--particularly a wolf. Theirs were in pretty bad shape!

Our lunch was nice, but the Ryasno kids didn't get to eat with us like last year (there wasn't as much money this time). My boys ate with me (becuase I paid for their meals), and Andrei thought he was quite special! Since there wasn't as much money for a feast this year, it worked out well that we brought the fruit and candy bags for the children!

After lunch, we tried to find Marta some still bottled water at the village stores...but no such luck! We only found carbonated water. So, we got on the bus (and thankfully found some water there, which Yura had for us) and headed back to Mogilev. The group dropped the boys and me off near our apartment building, and we hiked back on the side of the road (probably a little over a kilometer--it was COLD!).

When we got home, I immediately found my camera (Vova had put it down somewhere we never would have thought to look). Phew! Then we had dinner, heard another story from Denis, and Misha, Inna, he, and Anya went somewhere to visit for the evening (while leaving me in charge of the kids...with belt in hand!) Their kids took forever to settle down (even with numerous threats...they said I'm too nice of an uncle to spank them!), and I didn't get much sleep. Needless to say, I was tired the next morning when we went to church!

January 2nd continued

After we spent a little while at the zoo, it was time to meet Inna & Misha's houseguests from Russia (as if they didn't already have enough company!!). We met them in town, and Misha hopped in with them. These folks and he have all done mission work in "the North" (Siberia), so they have lots in common, and Misha was very excited to have them in town for a few days.

After dropping Misha off with them, we went back home for a little while and then we went back out to take Julia to her violin lesson, and then go visit Liza (from our Charlottesville ABRO group) and her grandma. We weren't planning on going to church that evening because we figured the children were restless with sitting there for more than two hours each night. Vova was a little disappointed--one, because he wanted to wear his new clothes! Second, he sensed in his heart of hearts that the reason this family is different is because of the Lord. He didn't understand everything about God, church, etc., but he did realize during this time that worshiping God is very necessary. He said, "We NEED to go to church tonight!" We assured him that we would most definitely be there Sunday morning. :-)

That afternoon, when we went back home after shopping, there was also another difficult "Andrei" incident. This one particularly upset me because it was directed toward Vova. Andrei basically said in some sort of subtle, mocking, sarcastic voice (as Vova was carrying his bag of new school clothes), "Yeah, you're pretty happy carrying that bag around, aren't you?" Of course I missed this, but Vova discreetly handed the bag to Inna and asked her to carry it because he didn't want to have a reason for Andrei to make fun of him.

When Inna filled me in on this sequence of events, she said it was evident to her that Vova was happy for Andrei that he had new clothes and was wondering why Andrei couldn't be happy for him and Denis as well. I immediately yanked Andrei into our room together to chat about this. He insisted he didn't do anything wrong, but I knew better. I explained to him that Vova loves him like a brother and that he should be ashamed of himself for mocking him. He told me that he was just telling Vova that his clothes were nice, but I know that's not the truth. In any case, Andrei knew I was upset, and he straightened up...fast.

As angry as I was over this (Vova has such a special place in my heart), as I've thought about it, I have more and more understanding for Andrei. I have to remember that, over the course of this trip, he was coming to terms with the fact that he will not be able to return to America this summer...and Vova and Denis will (Lord willing, of course).

Our visit to Liza's house was preceded by another God-ordained moment. Darkness was setting in for the evening (4pm), and as we were pulling up to their house, we saw a poor woman--freezing cold, dressed in rags--digging through the trash looking for food. Inna said they have lots of those in Mogilev (and I told her it's the same in big cities in America). I did ask her, though, if we could get out and give this woman a couple pieces of fruit (we were bringing a bag of it to Liza and her grandma). Vova immediately said he wanted to walk with me (he has such a kind heart). So we did. I handed her the fruit, gave her a hug and a kiss (she smelled of fish, which she'd probably found in the dumpster) and told her that we love her and so does God. I am praying that all the little incidents such as this one would really make an impression on Vova and the other boys...so that they can see Christ through my actions, since I can't always share everything with them through words.

It was wonderful to visit with Liza, her baby sister Masha, and her grandma for a while. Maria Ivanovna (grandma) fed us well, and we talked about Liza's host family, looked at the Christmas card and family picture they sent, etc. She filled me in on Liza's mom--how she had just gotten a state-subsidized apartment but might soon lose it because of her latest drinking binge. All the details were so sad, but this woman did nothing but praise God for his abundant provision for her and her children & grandkids (even though she has almost nothing). This was GREAT for my boys to see. She just prayed for us and loved on them! It was also great to see that the improvements to her home have continued. She no longer had to use the wood-burning stove for heat--new gas pipes (which were in the process of being installed last year) were up and running, and it was nice and warm inside! As we were heading out the door, I gave Liza's grandma some money for groceries or whatever, and we picked up Julia and went home.



When we got back from our visit, it was time to sort the American Halloween candy I'd brought and put it with the fruit we bought for the orphans that morning. We had to keep telling the kids to get lost so that we could concentrate. And Andrei started playing the sad, orphan, guilt-trip card again, saying that we were giving more to the kids at his school than we gave to him! After we scolded him, I think he realized how ridiculously self-centered he was being!

In all, we made 31 gift bags (for the 31 kids in the Ryasno Orphanage over the holidays) plus 4 extras...just in case.


After we finished the gift bags, we had to quickly tidy up the apartment because Misha and our Russian houseguests were coming home from church. It was nice to meet them (Denis and Anya). Denis had some great stories to tell the kids and also some neat magic tricks to show them. My Denis immediately bonded with him because they shared the same name! It was great to see him curl up beside this guy and put his arm around him while he was telling the story. Like Misha's stories, each one had a lesson about God in it. Like I've said, these kids were surrounded by Christian love while I was in Belarus!

By the time we got to bed, it was later than we had hoped...because we were headed to Ryasno with the ABRO group fairly early the next morning.

A Difficult New Year's Day, plus shopping, and a cold day at the ZOO

January 1, 2009

We slept in (longer than usual, of course) and stayed at home, knowing that we were going to the 3pm worship service at church that afternoon. Inna did some laundry and thus got the kids to take off the clothes they were wearing so that she could wash them. Andrei resisted, she insisted, and then found out the reason he didn't want to hand over his jeans. She found a wad of money in his pocket--the 5,000 rubles I'd given him two days before, but also another couple dollars' worth of rubles that he had apparently stolen from her purse or somewhere in the house. As soon as he handed over the jeans, Andrei knew what would ensue, so he sort of ignored Inna and me for a few minutes. When Inna said she wanted to speak with Andrei, he immediately ran to the bedroom to hide. He curled up into a ball on his bed and started crying. Inna just left him alone and went about her business. Of course, she was disappointed in him, but it's not like she started loving him any less. This is what we wanted him to know. Our love for him is much deeper than he thinks. For that reason, I just went into the bedroom with him, lay down beside him, and just rubbed his back while he cried. There were no words I could speak right then that would adequately express to him what I expressed by just lying there beside him, loving him. I prayed silently for him and just continue to lay there, running my fingers through his hair.

Eventually, he started to calm down, stopped crying, and started to lovingly rub my hand. He ever so quietly said, "I'm sorry, Papa."

And then I decided that the moment was right to talk together. "You know what, Andrei?" I asked.

"What?" he said.

"I love you. And I always will."

"Me, too," he responded.

And then I told him that I had already forgiven him before he ever said he was sorry. I explained that everyone makes mistakes--he does, I do, Inna and Misha do--and that God is always ready to forgive us. His love is not something we earn. This was an important lesson for this precious boy to learn. He knows that I love him, but it was surely God's way of assuring him once again that he doesn't have to earn my love either. I pray that, through this incident, Andrei would have a better understanding of love, forgiveness, and the Father heart of God.

After we talked for a few minutes, I left Andrei alone in the bedroom so that he could finish calming down. We went to church that afternoon and then headed to bed a bit earlier that night to get ready for our BUSY Saturday.

January 2, 2009

After breakfast, Misha, Inna, and I went to the Hippo store to exchange some money. The dollar went up in value (from 2,200 rubles per dollar to 2,600), so there was a long line at the bank. I gave Misha the money to exchange, and Inna and I went to get some groceries (and also look for gloves for Julia and Vova). We found some nice gloves for a good price and also picked up a bunch of groceries. After that, we headed to the loading dock where we buy the cheap fruit. Our goal today was to make little gift bags for each of the orphanage children at Ryasno.

We were excited because we'd found out early that the dollar had strengthened, so we could get more fruit for our money. However, when we arrived, the owner already knew, so guess what!! The fruit prices also went up! Bummer! We got some pomegranates, a crate of apples, and a couple crates of oranges for about $60, I think. And then we headed to another place to find bananas and pears. This place was a little more expensive, but still very cheap compared to the grocery store. We bought a bunch of miniature Bosc pears for less than a dollar a pound! And the bananas were about the same price as we would pay in America.

After we got the fruit, we drove home and hauled it all inside. Aunt Valla had made lunch for us, so we had a quick bite to eat before going shopping for Denis & Vova's school clothes. Andrei was particularly excited because he made the ultimate sacrifice and used his money to go buy the rice for lunch. I think this was his way of helping to make up for the thievery incident the day before. However, Inna told him that she would pay him back. (I know he was greatly reassured by this!!)

After lunch, Mark was upset because he had a slight fever and couldn't go shopping with us. It was COLD that day, and we were also planning on going to the zoo. Needless to say, many tears ensued, but we left him and the youngest kids there with Aunt Valla and told him we'd bring him back a surprise.

We stopped by several stores and ended up finding some nice clothes for Denis & Vova--new button-up shirts, ties, and zip-up sweaters like we'd bought for Andrei. As you can see, they were so handsome in their new outfits!

After we got the clothes, we went to the zoo to run around for a while. We bought cotton candy and enjoyed looking at the animals. It was GREAT to go to the zoo on a cold day. To keep warm, the animals were up and walking around--MUCH different from the 100-degree day in Washington a couple years ago when the lions and tigers were all sprawled out asleep in the shade!

New Year's Eve: The boys hear the Christmas Story for the first time ever

December 31, 2008

Again, we slept in on New Year's Eve. After breakfast, Inna's mom came over to help her prepare the food for our holiday dinner--they made a special salad (mayonnaise-based with imitation crab meat, egg, and corn) as well as "cutlets" (delicious ground-meat patties) which we would have late that night to usher in the New Year. After breakfast, Misha, the kids, and I got all bundled up and walked to the school to go sledding. After our purchases the day before, we had plenty of little sleds for everyone.

On the way to the hill, we stopped to observe some firemen doing some sort of rescue from a 7th-8th- floor apartment. The bystanders seemed to think there was someone passed out drunk or dead in the apartment. It was fun for the children to watch this for a few minutes. However, they soon lost interest, and we continued on our way to the sledding hill. I just had to take the following picture of 2-year-old Roma all bundled up...he reminds me of Randy from A Christmas Story!

It was a lot of fun to watch the kids, and I even got in on some of the action. They took turns seeing who went the farthest, and then Misha got a couple sticks and planted them in the ground to see if the kids could get between them. Even little Roma got in on some of the action (despite the fact that he was quite scared to go down the big hill at first).

When we were completely frozen, we went back to see the result of the rescue attempt, and someone said that the guy was dead! Honestly, though, I'm not sure if that was true or not. On the way back home, we stopped by the store to buy some bubbles, and I also got the kids some gum as well as some Coca-Cola to have with dinner that night.

When we got home, we had lunch (Borsch, pasta, sausage, etc.) and then I rested for a while before going to the New Year's Eve church service. There I met Marta (seen in the following picture), one of this year's ABRO trip participants. Her host family attends the same Baptist church as mine, and they sat her down next to me so that I could help her understand a little bit of what was going on. She was very relieved to find out that this church is SOLID--particularly because her child Igor was there with her every time they went to church. It was SO nice to speak to someone in English for a change! That made the 2-hour service go by much faster.

After church, we went home and played a few Bible games, and the kids continued playing with their balloons--we had gotten some really good ones at the store the day before. Around 11:15 or so, Misha called us all into the living room for a story. Since we had been singing Silent Night so much, it gave us a great reason to explain the reason we sing this special song. Misha asked Vova and Denis if they knew how Jesus was born. Surprisingly, they said, "No." (The Solonikovs had told me before that lots of non-believers in Belarus simply know that Jesus was born but that they don't know how or why). So Misha opened the Bible to the Gospel of Luke and proceeded to read us the Christmas story in Russian. And all of a sudden, I knew exactly why God had called me to Belarus again this year. Of course, we served many children and families on this trip--just like we do every year. However, when it hit me that the children were about to hear the Gospel message for the first time--in a loving, Christian environment where God's love is clearly evident every day--I immediately knew that this was one of the main reasons (if not THE main reason) God had orchestrated all the details of this year's trip.

Misha read to the children about how every man was called to his city of birth for a census, how Jesus was born in a stable because there was no room in the inn. As he read, he kept drawing Denis and Vova in with questions, and when he got to the part about the shepherds seeing the angels in the sky, he asked one of his own kids what the angel said. I think it was Pasha who recited the words: "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord."

And my boys just soaked all this up (while I was weeping for joy--because I was understanding almost every word Misha read). After Misha finished the story, we all got on our knees (just like we'd been doing each night before bed) and prayed, thanking God for sending us His Son, Jesus. Again, all I can say is, "Wow."

By that time, it was midnight, and the fireworks were starting. It was quite a view from our tenth-floor flat, and we really enjoyed watching the "show" as we ate our New Year's dinner. After we ate, we drank some tea, had some cake, and the kids were ready to go outside to watch the fireworks up close. Brrrr... NOT ME! A friend of theirs was outside with his kids, so we let the kids go out for a while. At 1am, I decided to be a party pooper and headed to bed. This was BY FAR the best New Year's Eve I've ever spent in Belarus--because I actually got some sleep! And my boys slept out in the living room on blankets that night so that they wouldn't disturb me. They said they didn't go to bed until 4am. I wouldn't know--I was dead to the world by then.

Mogilev: Shopping & Dinner with Iryna

Vova always volunteered to help while in the Solonikovs' home! Here, he's doing the dishes...there were LOTS to do!

December 30, 2008

After breakfast, we headed out to buy Milena a birthday present (she turned 4--we got her a baby stroller and two little dolls.), and we also needed to do a little shopping for Andrei. I told him I would buy him a Lego car to build, and we ended up finding a great deal on some off-brand constructor cars (only about $2.50 each), so we got one for each of the boys back at home, too!

Inna and Misha take Andrei to church when they bring him home for the orphanage, so we thought it would be appropriate to buy him a church outfit. After exchanging some money, we got him new slacks, a couple pairs of warm socks, a button-up shirt with a tie, and a nice sweater to wear over top of everything. He seemed fairly indifferent about shopping for clothes, but I think that deep down he was excited and enjoyed it as Inna and I made a fuss to dress him up. As you can see in the picture, he is so handsome and looks so much more mature in this outfit! Now, if only his behavior were more mature... :-)

When we finished shopping, we hurried home to have a quick lunch because I was to meet Iryna that afternoon. Aunt Valla had made some homemade dumplings (kind of like Pelmini, only better).

Iryna was waiting for us when we arrived at the bus stop. We walked around for a while, running a few errands and just catching up with each other's lives. She had to buy a little notebook, and I bought some batteries for my massager (I put the kids to work each night--either massaging my back with the massager or scratching my back...Denis has the best touch!) As a side note, this was kind of funny. Denis kept saying, "Papa, if you give me $1, I'll scratch your back." I agreed, and of course Andrei chimed in saying that he, too, wanted to give me a massage! And Denis kept trying to make deals with me. "I'll scratch your back and do a good job for 10 minutes, and you can give me $2!" He was cracking me up. One time he said, "Papa, I'll scratch your back for free." (I knew he was up to something.) And of course 30 seconds later, he asked me if he could go in the kitchen and have some more soda! Yep, I knew it. He was buttering me up...and he admitted it! And of course I told him he wasn't allowed to drink so late at night...to avoid bedwetting!

Eventually, Andrei and Denis kind of lost interest in giving me my nightly massage, but I could certainly count on Vova to do so. :-) I love that kid so much.

Iryna and I made a few more purchases that day--first, scarves for Andrei, Denis, and Vova. We looked at a few wool ones, but they were expensive ($20), and then we found some for about $12, which I liked much better--plus, they weren't scratchy! After we bought scarves, we bought some of the plum candies that I LOVE, and we also went on a hunt for pineapples (the kids love them). We found two nice ones at the open-air market--I think we paid around $9 for both of them--not too bad (they're sold by the kilogram rather than per piece).

When we finished shopping, we hopped on the crowded bus (reminded me of Metro rides in Washington!!) and went back to Iryna's place for dinner. She had been saving MUSHROOMS for me in her freezer since August! These mushrooms (fried with onion) are one of my favorite foods in Belarus. (I didn't get any last year because the mushroom harvest was so poor.) I was very excited and enjoyed the smells coming from the kitchen as Iryna cooked dinner.

When we got to her place, I rested on the couch for a while and dozed off, too. I also took a second look at the scarves and decided I liked them so much that I wanted one for myself. [I found out later that evening from Inna that Andrei had already gotten a nice scarf in an Operation Christmas Child box, so I ended up getting to keep HIS for myself! I was excited!]

Iryna had so many of my favorite foods for dinner! In addition to the mushrooms, I LOVE the dried sausage, and she also had these chocolate cookies (wafers dipped in chocolate or caramel and rolled in peanuts) that I love, plus oranges, and her own herbal tea. Mmmmmm...

After dinner, we rested some more and just chatted for a while--about the families in our ABRO group, about our children, the upcoming summer, and we also arranged our plans with Philip's family so that the boys and I could visit them in their home.

Misha picked me up around 9:00 (they had been at a church service with the kids that evening), and we went home so they could all have dinner. I was stuffed, of course, but I did have some fruit after dinner (we had one of the pineapples). Before bed, he told the kids another story--about the dangers of greed.

Mogilev: The boys experience the love of a Christian family

Saturday, December 27th, cont'd:

I think that Natasha Sofin (the boys' mom) rode with us to Mogilev because she was expecting a hand-out. Or perhaps she wanted to see where we would be staying (but she really doesn't care that much about her sons, so I'm more convinced that she thought I was going to give her some money). She got no money directly from me--only groceries & gifts. This is dangerous for her because she would be tempted to waste it on alcohol.

When we got to Mogilev in the late afternoon, Andrei and the Solonikov children greeted us warmly, and chaos ensued. Misha (the dad in our host family) was in Minsk for a Baptist conference and was due in that evening. Andrei was in rare form because he was happy to see Vova and Denis, so he felt the need to show off. Inna said that she perceived an automatic change in his behavior when we walked in the door. Vova was also acting up a bit--not listening to me, etc. He does this from time to time in situations where he's not too comfortable. Eventually, after he once blatantly disobeyed me, I let him know I was upset by telling him several times, "I'm not talking to you." After a few minutes, I went into our bedroom and found him lying face down on my bed, sort of crying. I lay down beside him and asked him if he knew why I wasn't happy with his behavior. There was some misunderstanding, I found out, and I reassured him that the only reason I was upset was that I had told him to "Come here," and he went the opposite way. I reiterated that when Papa says to do something, he should do it. And of course he immediately understood (he is the most well-behaved of my boys) and assured me that he would always obey me.

Andrei's behavior, on the other hand, wasn't so easily corrected. Inna told me that he had been quite jealous when he got to their home and found out I was already in Cherikov visiting Vova & Denis. (This precious family had picked up Andrei on the 24th after he finished school and brought him home with them for the holidays--they have been doing this often ever since we met them on last year's trip to Belarus).

Andrei ended up telling us (before Misha got home) that things weren't as he expected this year. He told us that he didn't want to go to church, that he uses bad words, had tried smoking, and had no interest in leading a good life. [He'd already even tried to get Vova to say that he's not going to church either...VERY sneaky! (Vova complies with whatever is asked of him)] Andrei had expected me to come directly to HIS orphanage first...just like last year so that he could be the big HERO whose American papa was going to buy things for the orphanage children, etc. (This is just Andrei's self-centered personality--very characteristic of orphans). However, this is not the image I want the kids to have of me. (First of all, the money I brought to Belarus is God's money, not mine).

Anyway, we tried to help Andrei see that the important thing was that I was THERE in Belarus to visit him--not to buy him stuff. He did say that he hadn't been eating well in the Ryasno Orphanage and wanted to eat like crazy, just like he gets to do in America. So, I did give Inna some money to go to the grocery store to buy us some groceries. She bought us Pelmini, which all the kids love, and we chowed down when she got back. She fried some of them first (they're particularly delicious that way) and then put the rest of them in a soup for the kids (because they can stretch them further this way). And of course we also feasted on the fruit we'd bought earlier that week.

When Misha got home, I sang some songs and played the piano for them, and they of course asked me to sing Silent Night the next morning in the church service. Misha also told us a story from his mission experience--he is a GREAT storyteller. He knows how to keep the kids' attention. Vova was playing one of the games while the story was being told, but I could tell that he was definitely listening. The story was about a missionary in Siberia who was witnessing to one of the people groups there--how he asked God for a sign to show the people that He was real. And God sent them just such a sign--an eclipse, and then the people fell to their knees worshiping God and asking this missionary to tell them more about Him. GREAT stuff for the kids to hear!! After the story, we all got on our knees and said our prayers. Vova & Denis only listened while everyone else prayed (of course Andrei wanted to show off and pray first!). They all prayed in Russian, and I prayed in English. Then we went to bed because the next morning was Sunday, and we had to get up early.

Sunday, December 28th, 2008

We got up around 8:00, had breakfast (buttered bread with salami & cheese, fruit, hot tea) and then headed to church. A few kids rode with Uncle Pavel because all of us didn't fit in their VW Passat station wagon. I was nervous because I was singing Silent Night in the service! I didn't understand most of the service, but a few things I did understand. The only 'religious' vocabulary I know is the words I learned when I learned Silent Night--salvation, Savior, peace, heaven... However, I did recognize one scripture reference from Matthew 25--the parable of the sheep and the goats where Jesus said that "whatever you do for one of the least of these brothers of mine you also did for me." Of course, this is my favorite scripture to use with ABRO presentations, so my ears perked up. Like I've said before, only God can make this stuff up!

When it was my turn to sing, Mark (the 9-year-old son) went with me to hold the microphone. I had to keep signaling for him to move the mic closer to my face (and that's quite difficult while you're singing in Russian!). I was really nervous, but once I sat down at the piano and began worshiping, everything was fine. As I will relate later on, the simple Christmas carol, Silent Night, took on much significance throughout my stay in Belarus--particularly for Vova and Denis. We sang it in the car, at home, at church, everywhere. I know we sang it 40 times in all. God planted these words in the boys' hearts, and this gave us a great discussion tool later on. More on that later!

When the service was over, I looked down at my watch, incredulous. Two and a half hours had passed! Phew, that was a long service! I greeted several friends who also attend this Baptist church--namely Liza's grandma, Maria! Everyone greeted me warmly--a couple people even spoke English with me (they were happy to have someone to practice with).

After church, we went home and had lunch and then rested for a while. The kids went outside while I napped, and of course Andrei tried to weasel his way out of Sunday evening church. (He KNOWS that this family goes every Sunday evening. However, about 5:00 when it was time to get ready to go back to church, he started telling Inna that he was tired and wanted to lie down for a nap. She told him (in love, of course) that she's not a little child and that she understood exactly what he was doing.) Needless to say, we all went to church, and the service was followed by a year-end business meeting. I took the kids outside sledding while the adults were in the meeting, which I thought would NEVER EVER end. One of the kids (not one of mine) was misbehaving, and I had to resolve several disputes. :-) I told my boys that, after church, we would get ice cream to have after dinner. That really made their eyes light up!

When the meeting FINALLY ended, I went with Inna to the Hippo store while the kids went home. Apparently, this didn't please Andrei. He wanted to go with us so that he could buy what he wanted. When we got home and had already been shopping, he sort of pitched a subtle fit and went into his room to pout. Iryna called me that evening to see how things were going, and while I was chatting with her, Misha had a long talk with Andrei...about his selfishness. Misha capitalized on this as an opportunity to put all the kids in bed (after praying with them), and then he, Inna, and I talked until very late (probably 2 a.m.). We talked about Andrei, his future, and we talked about the Sofin boys, too. They assured me that their door is always open for Andrei--very reassuring for me to hear. He is really hard to love sometimes, but they really want to make sure he knows that the love they have for him is a love that God put in their hearts.

When I finally went to bed, Andrei and Denis were snoring (loudly), and I had to keep manually turning Denis's head to get him to change positions and stop snoring so I could go to sleep!

Monday, December 29th, 2008

This was an uneventful day. I stayed in all day, and the kids went out once for a while with Misha--to go sledding (I was taking a nap while they went). :-) By the evening, I had cabin fever because I ended up watching the kids while Misha and Inna went to evening church. (Every New Year, there are nightly services a few days before the 31st...to pray for the upcoming year). I was SO glad when they got back. We had dinner (cold, smoked chicken--very good), and Misha told the kids another story. This one was about a little boy who broke his neighbor's car, didn't confess, and his conscience started to bother him. And one of the boy's friends had seen him break the car and blackmailed him in exchange for favors. In the end, the boy confessed, and his father ended up paying for the repairs and telling him that it's better to bring things into the light. Of course, all this was a parable to show the boys how God paid our debt through Jesus and how Satan tries to hold our sins over our heads to hold us captive.

I also decided that evening (and discussed it with Lena in the ABRO office) that I would NOT be spending the three days in Andrei's orphanage. We prayed about it and decided that it would not do him any good to have me go and buy things for the orphanage while he was there (because he really thinks money is the most important thing in the world). Furthermore, I thought that the orphanage environment wouldn't be the best for Vova and Denis. I felt God leading me to keep them there in the Christian family for as long as I could. This was DEFINITELY the right thing to do.

I was sad about not spending time with the precious kids at Ryasno, but I did come to find out that there was already a group of Americans staying there and loving on those kids. Plus, Nick and Paul from our ABRO group were heading out there on the 1st, so I knew that these boys and girls would have lots of people giving them some much-needed love and attention. I would have to just settle for our day trip out there on the 3rd.

Belarus Mission Trip 08-09--Arrival in Mogilev, Christmas in Cherikov

Dear friends and family,

I did most of the writing below after the fact. I was so busy in Belarus this year and really wanted to be "in the moment" rather than spending loads of time journaling. Toward the end of the trip, I wrote down the basics of what each day's events were, and as I sit here typing now, I am adding all of the details, anecdotes, and reflections. I hope you enjoy reading the story of this trip and how God was glorified in so many ways.

"In truth, I tell you: whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me."

--Matthew 25:40

Monday, December 22, 2008

The trip up to Dulles with Grandma was uneventful. I called Denis on the way, and he (very excitedly) said, "Papa, you know what? Yesterday we got a big, big snow!" Of course, I was excited because my past two trips to Belarus have been largely without snow.

At the Lufthansa counter, I had to ditch 8kg of candy in order to avoid a $350 overage fee. I had to equal out my two bags so that one wasn't more than 23kg. The second bag was 30kg, so I did have to pay a $150 fee. I tried to argue my way out of it, saying that the candy was going to an orphanage in Belarus, but the employees seemed indifferent to my plea.

I then breezed through the security checkpoint and then had about 2 hours to kill waiting for my flight. I got a bite to eat and then read the latest issues of The Hook and Time. The flight over to Frankfurt was fine, and we made it on time. I unfortunately had to go through two more security checkpoints in Frankfurt (one had a really long line), and I also picked up a bottle of water so as not to get dehydrated on the flights.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

I arrived in Minsk on time--1:30pm, bought my insurance policy, and headed to passport control. Our customs contact met me promptly and greeted me in English. He said I looked exactly like I was described to him--a big guy with a beard! I'm glad I'm so conspicuous. :-) He told me to ditch my customs declaration form so that I wouldn't have to pay duties (I'd filled it out so painstakingly!!)

I was really nervous about the new laptop I was carrying. It stressed me out to be responsible for such an expensive piece of equipment! I purchased it in the USA for Svetlana's son since we can purchase them so much more cheaply (Svetlana is our ANGEL in Cherikov--she and other social workers look after the Sofin children for me). Her son Stas will begin college this fall and will need a good laptop. Thankfully, God provided the funds so that she did not need to reimburse me for this. If anyone ever deserved to be blessed, it is Svetlana. She would go to the ends of the earth for me and for our children. I praise God for her and was so glad to help her and her son. More about that later!

So, I was quite glad to see a friendly face in customs to help get me through with all my 'gear' intact! Both of my bags arrived with me, and I then headed through the 'green line' and out of the airport (but not before I handed our friend $40 and wished him and his family Merry Christmas!!) No big deal, it's just doing business in a different culture. I was very grateful for this guy's help.

One guy was signaling for me to come around (so my bags could be inspected), but I just acted like I was a stupid foreigner who didn't understand Russian, and I made a beeline for the exit where Svetlana's friend Pavel was waiting for me with my name on a sign. We hopped in their car and headed about 40 minutes into Minsk to the train station. We bought my ticket for about $12 (it cost more so that I could actually have a bed to sleep in for the 4-hour train ride). It was crowded for the first little bit on the train, but one guy moved to a different compartment so that I could lie down and sleep (I hadn't slept the whole way to Belarus--I never do). We left at 3:30 and arrived Mogilev around 7:20. I was worried at first because Inna and Misha were nowhere to be found! But, they arrived just as I was exiting the platform. On the way home, we bought a few groceries plus lots of laundry detergent for the Sofins. The new "Hippo" store was quite American in its layout. I also exchanged some money there in the bank. Then, we went home, greeted the kids, and played for a while. I gave them their gifts (they were so excited!!), we ate dinner, and Misha and I hung out and chatted a while. Then, it was time for bed. I slept fitfully, knowing that the following day we would be meeting Denis and Vova.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

We got up around 9:00, had breakfast, and did a little shopping. First, we bought around $200 of fruit--for us, for the Sofins, and for the children in the Cherikov Shelter. Inna said it was better to go ahead and buy the fruit because the prices always increase at New Year's. So that's why we went ahead and bought some fruit for us (their family, my boys, and me) to eat when we returned from Cherikov that weekend. They kept it out on the balcony, and it stayed plenty fresh. We bought two crates of pears, oranges, persimmons, grapes, bananas, plus trail mix and some mixed nuts. The guys gave us some over-ripe pears as a freebie (since we bought so much). All this was truly a luxury for my host family, and it definitely was for the Sofin family whom we visited the next day in Cherikov.

After we bought the fruit, we went to the Belarussian equivalent of Sam's Club and bought some pasta, fish, and other staples for the Sofins (it was a bit cheaper at this place). After all the shopping, we went home, ate some of Aunt Valla's delicious fried pies (she made a few visits to help Inna with the cooking while her holiday guests were there), had lunch, and then Svetlana arrived to take me to Cherikov. The boys didn't come with her because they were in school that morning when they left.

As we neared Cherikov (an hour's drive from Mogilev), my heart was about to leap out of my chest. I couldn't wait to see Denis & Vova! We called them when we were about 30 minutes away, and the kids headed out to the main road bus stop to meet us. I saw them from far away as we approached the stop. Then they got in, and I promptly covered them with hugs and kisses! We then headed to the Shelter to drop off my luggage. I passed out bubble gum to my boys as well as to the 8 kids living there. We played for a little bit, I gave Vova & Denis their presents--remote-control AirHog cars that drive on the walls & ceiling!! We immediately charged them up and played with them a while.

By then, it was time to head to Svetlana's house for Christmas Eve dinner. I took pictures of Vova in his handsome school uniform (which he insisted on wearing), and then we had a lovely candlelight dinner with her husband as well as her friend Lena and her son Artyom (who had just come home from the lyceum for the holidays). We had several toasts with champagne, and the kids also enjoyed "dyetskoe champansko" (children's champagne) as well as Fanta and ice cream, which we had gotten from the store earlier. I was so humbled by Svetlana's hospitality. She thought I would be more comfortable in her home, so she offered to let me stay there. I declined and said that I just wanted to be with Denis & Vova in the Shelter. And then, amazingly, she said, "Well, they can just stay here, too." I was blown away. This is how much she loves the children (and me, too).

I met Svetlana last year in Cherikov and have kept my friendship going with her over the past 12 months. I call her at least once week, asking how she is doing and how my kids are doing in their village of Tur'ye (about 3-4km outside of Cherikov). I am so grateful that God had the two of us become friends. She is really looking out for my boys, and now she has even taken an interest in my Andrei--more about that later! Only God can think this stuff up!! :-)

That night, Vova slept in Stas's room, and Denis and I slept on the fold-out couch. It was a little cramped, but I didn't mind because he was right there beside me (well, that's mostly a pleasant experience--if you know Denis well, you know that he's quite a gassy boy... and this is really evident while he's asleep!!) :-)

I had a little trouble sleeping that night because I was still suffering from an allergy attack (the previous week I'd been at Miller's in Charlottesville to hear Jeff Decker play Christmas jazz music, and it's quite smoky in that place--it really fired up my allergies). So, I coughed a bit during the night (which made Svetlana worry about me) and couldn't sleep. It worked out okay, though. As I lay there awake beside Denis, I just rubbed his back and prayed for him. I prayed for his protection, for this trip to have a profound effect on him, for him to be able to come back to me in the summer, and most importantly that, over the course of the coming weeks and months, he would be truly drawn to the Lord.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

We slept in until 9:00 or so when one of the boys got up to go outside to the toilet. We drank tea, and Svetlana made blinis (Belarussian pancakes, which are more like crepes) for breakfast. The night before, Vova had asked if she'd make blinis because it had been so long since he'd had them. :-) They were served with some of the best homemade raspberry preserves I've ever tasted.

After breakfast, we headed to the Shelter to pick up presents for the Sofins, as well as all the fruit and groceries we had bought for them the day before. We loaded everything up into Victor's car, and he drove us out there. I have to say that I was quite nervous--extremely nervous, actually... with a huge lump in my throat and a pit in my stomach. Plus, I didn't know what I would find when I got there. I felt bad just breezing into town the day before and swooping Denis and Vova away with me and sort of leaving the rest of the family high and dry. Of course, it's not feasible to take the whole family with me, but it still felt kind of awkward to me. I know, however, that it was so important for Denis and Vova to have some stable time away from their chaotic home environment. And I was very anxious about stepping into the chaos.

We were greeted warmly by Natasha, the younger children, and Pavel (their oldest brother--a very responsible young man), along with his two children. Misha (Vova & Denis's father) was working that day. I chatted with Pavel a while because I wanted make sure to get to know their oldest brother. Svetlana tells me that he truly loves his siblings and has been a stable role model for them. I am so thankful for this. He makes a better living than his parents because he goes back & forth to Moscow working in construction. He even has a car. I am hoping that Denis and Vova look to him for an example of how to live...rather than their other brothers or their parents. :-(

We ate some sweets, had tea, and the children enjoyed their presents--purses filled with girly goodies for Tanya & Lena (THANKS, MISSY!!), art supplies inside a new backpack for Kristina (THANKS, TAMMY & DUANE!!), remote control car & Matchbox cars for Zhenya/Vanya, a big bag of chocolates, M&M-filled candy canes, fruit, etc. It was truly a memorable Christmas party! It was pretty chaotic inside that little village house, but that's to be expected. It was, after all, Christmas Day!

After a while, we decided to go outside for sledding and a snowball fight. They all ganged up on me, and we had a ball. It was so beautiful. There's a little grove of Christmas trees out in the field beyond the Sofins' house. After a while, Lyosha (the boys' 23-year-old brother--he has some sort of mental handicap) hooked up the horse to a little sleigh, and Lena drove us around the field and the village on a "one-horse open sleigh!" Now I can sing "Jingle Bells" with extra vigor! The Sofins also had a little pony, and she insisted on trotting behind us the whole way. It was quite cold, and my back was cramped, but I had the boys with me, so to me everything was right in the world. Vova asked me, "Are you having fun, Papa?" I told him that it was the best Christmas I'd ever had. And, looking back on it, that is no exaggeration.

When we got cold, we went back inside for more tea/candy, and we chatted a while. Then the kids turned on a movie. I made sure to inspect the DVD collection, which sort of upset me. There were plenty of R-rated, inappropriate movies there, and I know my kids have seen them all. More about that later, though. I did have a chat with Vova about that.

Overall, I got over my nervousness quite fast that day and ended up having a wonderful time at the Sofins' house. I really wish it could be that way there everyday. After about four hours, Victor came back to pick us up and take us to his mom's house for her birthday party. Svetlana was already there with flowers and a gift in hand. We had a Skype conversation with Andrei back in Washington, and I was also able to send an email home. After that, we headed to the woods for a picnic!

While we got the fire going, the boys found sheets of plastic and went sledding. We spread out a vinyl table cloth on the snow and set all the food down on it. We then cooked salo (fatback) on the open fire and enjoyed other foods as well--beef cutlets, cole slaw, black bread, etc. I took a small (1/4 ounce) vodka shot just to be polite and then just drank champagne and a little coffee after that. It was a lot of fun to hang out, watch the boys sledding, and chat. We were plenty warm by the fire. After a while, my stomach started hurting (maybe it had something to do with the salo!!), so Svetlana and I hiked back to the Shelter to meet the boys and go home. When we got there, we stayed with the children a while. Valera (7-year-old boy with very poor vision) begged us to stay a while, so we did. I broke out the piano music I'd brought from America. I played some Chris Rice Christmas piano music and also sang the songs I'd learned in Russian--Silent Night, How Great Is Our God, and of course Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer!

Svetlana wanted me to keep playing and keep playing. She said that, when she heard me sing the sacred songs, it was like nourishment to her soul. When I sang How Great Is Our God, one of the girls at the Shelter, 15-year-old Tanya, said she knew that song (because she attends the local Baptist church). So, I sang it again, and she sang with me. Svetlana asked me if I'd sing it again when the ABRO group came to Cherikov on January 5th, and of course I said I would.

Then, we declined another person's invitation to come over for dinner and headed home. However, this guy was persistent. He kept begging for Svetlana to bring me to meet him and eat with him...because it was his birthday! Seriously, he wouldn't leave us alone (called every 5 minutes), so we broke down and went (he only lived about 1/2 km from Svetlana's house). We ate, had some toasts (I toasted with juice that time!!), and then after about an hour, finally headed home. The rest of the evening was very low-key. Denis and Vova played with the Lego cars I'd brought them, and we also played a little Don't Break the Ice and Jenga.

After a while, we went to bed. Denis slept with me again, and I prayed for him that night, too...as I lay awake coughing again! :-)

Friday, December 26, 2008

Because we ate so much yesterday, I asked Svetlana to please only make me eat a little breakfast! That morning, we headed into town to make some home visits to prospective ABRO kids. Svetlana first told me about 9-year-old Sasha who she said is such a good boy. His mom, Larissa, works at the Shelter as a caretaker, and his dad moved away a long time ago to start a new family. She said he has plenty of money but that he's not really interested in his first family...how someone can abandon such a precious child, I DO NOT KNOW. Svetlana told me that recently she had helped this family to fix up their house a bit but that they still have quite a difficult life since the mom is the only provider in the household. Plus, Sasha also has an older sister (about 15, I think) named Marina.

When we got to their house, Denis was greeted warmly by Vlad, whom he knows from school. Vlad has been in a summer program to England before and also told us a little about his difficult life--alcoholic parents, being raised by his grandmother...the usual. :-( We got to know Sasha a little bit, and my boys went in to play video games with him. Then Svetlana asked me to play their piano. All the while, we drank tea to warm up. More about this family later. We hung out with them more later on.

Next, we went into town to exchange some money and also buy new boots for Vova. His boots from America had broken not long ago, so he had wet feet! We bought him a nice pair of warm, leather, zip-up boots for around $45. Then we headed to the store to buy him some pajama pants--sort of like long underwear which they wear underneath their pants to keep warm during the winter. We got a pair for both him and Denis as well as two pairs each of warm winter socks. After that, we stopped by another store to buy some soap and cleaning supplies for the Shelter. Then we headed out to visit another boy in the town, and on the way there, we bought Pelmini for lunch and also bubble gum and fruit for the children at the Shelter.

We met 8-year-old Kostya and gave him a banana and a couple packs of gum. Svetlana thinks that he, too, would be a good candidate for our program. When she described him, she said that he's so tiny and just shivers and shivers in the cold! :-) Kostya basically has no mother--she is in prison. And Svetlana said that his dad takes okay care of the kids but that he does drink a lot. Kostya's sister has been in the ABRO program for four years now, I believe. We chatted with his dad for a few minutes and inquired about Kostya being able to participate in the program. Svetlana said it would be so good for him and that she would do all the necessary paperwork. The dad seemed resistant to this. He said that he was a nice person and that it wasn't necessary. However, Svetlana thinks he'll sign for Kostya to come (just like he signs for his daughter to come) and that they'll send the papers to the mother in prison so she can also sign off. I took a picture of little Kostya, and the dad also gave us a couple of pictures of him to take. He is so adorable, and I'd really like to somehow get him to Charlottesville this summer!

When we left their house, we went back to the Shelter to warm up and have Pelmini (Russian dumplings) for lunch. We then drank some coffee and headed to another village to visit 17-year-old Dima's family. His folks picked us up in their car and drove us there. They have a ferocious attack dog to scare away strangers, and we hot-footed it inside to meet Dima.

This boy was born with an extremely deformed spine and has lain in bed ever since birth. Since Svetlana has many connections with foreigners who can help, oftentimes these friends will ask her for help. This family needs lots of disposable diapers so they don't have to use cloth ones. They wanted me to meet Dima so that I could see exactly whom we were helping.

Despite their general curiosity, we didn't let Vova and Denis in the room because Svetlana said that this poor boy wasn't something to make a spectacle of.

It was both heart-warming and heart-breaking to see this boy. His father just doted on him, loved on him, and smiled at him so proudly. He said in such a sweet voice, "Dima, do you see that Uncle Adam has come to visit you?" And this precious boy just smiled back at his loving father. I spoke to him for a minute, and they told me, of course, that he can't talk. So I just spoke to him in the most tender and loving voice I could muster, stroked his head, and gave him a kiss. Svetlana by then was in tears, and I almost was, too.

After we greeted Dima, we sat down to the wonderful meal this couple had prepared for us. It was hard to eat again, but I forced it down (and I also graciously declined the kholodyets--a cold, congealed fat salad which is popular around the holidays). I've tried it before and can't stomach it. :-)

After our second lunch, we headed back to the Shelter for a while. Alina and her father came to visit us and pick up her Christmas card from her host family. We took a picture and then accepted their invitation to their house later that evening for tea. Then they left, and the boys, Svetlana, and I went back to her house to rest. After a while, Alina and her dad came back to pick us up and take us to their flat. There we enjoyed dinner #1 as well as hot tea and sweets. They showed me some pictures of Alina, and we just chatted for a while. The boys and Alina went out to play for a little bit while we adults talked, and then they came back in to warm up. It was nice to get to know this little family. Alina said she was so glad we came but next time bring her Mama with me! After a couple hours, they took us home to Svetlana's house for dinner #2!

When we got there, Stas was home, and we officially gave him the laptop I'd brought from America. His eyes just lit up, and he was utterly overwhelmed by this gift. Svetlana later told me that there were tears running down his face as he came to terms with how it came to be that such a gift was given to him. He kept asking her what he should do to thank me, but I just told him to thank God because it was He, and no one else, who provided this.

Stas's mother Svetlana is such a special lady who works so hard for the children of Cherikov. She had planned on paying me back for the computer (she'd been working extra for months), but because of the magnitude of the sacrifices she makes for the children of Cherikov, some friends and I got the money together ourselves so that we could just tell her to keep her money.

Her work is truly a ministry. If any family deserves to be blessed, it is Svetlana's. Her husband fell off a roof 8 years ago and is basically an invalid. She is the sole provider and works day & night--not for money but because she loves the children she cares for. She works as a director during the day and as a caretaker during the night. Words cannot describe how wonderful she is. The lives of countless children have been changed because of her and her loving staff at the Cherikov Shelter.

After all that, Stas showed me some pictures of the lyceum (upper-level boarding school) he attends, and then Larissa (Sasha's mom) came over for dinner #2. She and Svetlana made a "pirok," (pie) which was one of the most delicious things I tasted this year in Belarus. It was sort of like a big chicken pot pie, but way better. I really didn't feel like eating again, but I did--just to appease Svetlana and Larissa. Plus, Larissa had baked a cake (she felt bad earlier that she hadn't baked anything when we came to visit), so I choked down a piece of that, too. I felt bad that I couldn't enjoy it--I was just so full!!

Over dinner, we had a few more toasts, and Svetlana insisted that we go around the table, one by one, with everyone toasting to me. I am uncomfortable with that much attention, but I got through it. She even had Vova and Denis give me some Christmas/New-Year wishes! Throughout the meal, it became evident to me that Svetlana was trying to hook me up with Larissa! She'd taken a picture of the two of us together, and she just kept saying over and over again how nice and kind I am. :-) Despite my nervousness, I kind of got a kick out of the whole situation, and you know, finding a Belarussian wife isn't completely out of the realm of possibilities for me. You just never know (plus, there were plenty more women and attempts at match-making to come in Mogilev--very entertaining for me!!)

After we ate, Svetlana, Lena, and I walked Larissa back to her house (almost all the way home). It was so cold, and I was completely "zamyors" (frozen) by the time we got back home. When we got home, we went to BED (I was so tired of eating!!). That night, Vova slept beside me so that I could pray over him as he slept. I was coughing less by then, thanks to the Nasonex Grandma gave me the night before I left. So, thankfully I slept better that night.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

We woke up, had a light breakfast, and walked to the pharmacy to buy diapers for Dima (plus some cough medicine and stomach pills for me--Svetlana insisted). We bought as many of Dima's size diapers as they had in stock, and I promised to leave some more money with them later. After that, we bought some art supplies and Christmas decorations for the Shelter's upcoming Christmas parties, and then we went over to Svetlana Ivanovna's flat for tea. The boys enjoyed playing on her son's computer while we talked and drank tea. Then we went back to the Shelter for a while until about 2:00 when Natasha Sofin's friend came to pick us up and take us to Mogilev.

More Cherikov Pictures...

My Christmas presents under the tree (Denis & Vova) :-)

Pictures of Denis & me at Svetlana's house, followed by a pic of the Orthodox church in Cherikov